Saturday, November 27, 2010

On being a woman alone

It freaks me out to sleep by myself. I having done it in a very long time. I had a fabulous lunch with an amazing friend today. I love her. At lunch, we talked about our past relationships. I told her how it freaks me out to sleep alone. She said that it's probably because there's no a warm body next to mine. As sad as it is to say it, I think she's right. I'm sad that I failed as something, even though everyone tells me differently. I'm not use to being by myself. I'm not lonely, I'm alone. I need to learn to be alone again. I need to learn to trust myself again. I need to spend time on me. This is so much easier said than done, but I'm going to try. I know I am loved and that I am strong and can get through anything. I really do have an amazing support system behind me. I don't know where I would be without them. I love y'all.


Katydid said...

I know the feeling but it does pass.. Sadly I am now in a place where I prefer to have the lovely squishy pillowy amazingness of a bed to myself (and sometimes my dog).. I am working on finding a middle ground. :)

I am glad you have such wonderful people around you!

With Love,

Jaime said...

I've never been bad at being alone. I love alone time. I'm thankful that my husband has a job now, so that I can have some time to focus on me every day and get in touch with myself in ways I can't when there's anyone else around.

Everything takes time. :]

Linda said...

Hi there!
I'm excited for you. I had one giant huge horrible break up in 2005 (4 year relationship) and the most fun and hardest time I had were simultaneous and it was the joy and pain I experienced relearning how to be by myself and getting to know myself all over again.
This is an adventure. Promise.
- Linda

Heather said...

Katy- thank you :)
Jamie- it's hard for me to be alone right now; I know it will pass
Linda- I want to learn to by myself again. I'm just not sure how.